“The person who is "in love" has the illusion that his beloved is perfect.”

― Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate

We are born with our need for love the moment we come out to the world. This need grows with us as we progress through life and can turn into a destructive source of energy once we are not fulfilled or when we don’t feel a strong sense of love from the people around us. 

According to most relationship coaches, there are 5 different types of languages to express love, as  Gary Chapman said in his book The Five Love Languages, we as humans are so different when it comes to receiving and giving love. 

In this blog, we will explain one of the most important, yet tricky, topics that most relationship coaches face during their coaching sessions with clients. 

Besides knowing the love language for you and your partner it is very essential to know & heal yourself from within through our course Healing from Within. 

What Are The 5 Languages of Love? 

Dr. Gary Chapman classified love into five languages that will certainly improve the quality of your relationships with your partner, family members, and friends. 

As we mentioned above, relationship coaches, and even life coaches, should educate their clients that expressing love in a different language other than the one your loved one speaks is just like one person speaking Italian and the other speaking Arabic.

It is highly recommended by relationship coaches to their clients in coaching sessions to know what is their love language and what is their partner's love language. How can you know what your dominant love language is?  you can simply ask for a love language test from your professional coach during or even after the coaching session. 

The 5 Love Languages

1.   Physical Touch 

Surprisingly, people whose first love language is physical touch are not touchy or high on hugs with everyone. 

On the contrary, they are selective with who they give their physical touch to because it is their highest form of love expression which is exclusive to their loved ones. 

2.   Quality Time 

When someone’s first love language is quality time, they would appreciate you giving them your full attention with zero interruption.

A simple look at your phone while having a conversation with them can hurt their feelings very much and cause them to let their frustration out in so many ways such as an outlast, or even ending the conversation and not feeling safe again.

3.   Words of Affirmation 

We are familiar with “Actions speak louder than words,” for those whose first love language is words of affirmation, it is “Words that speak louder than actions.” Phrases such as “I love you” “I care about you” and “I would move mountains for you” matter the most. Telling them how beautiful they are and how smart they are means the world to them. 

That is why during a coaching session, it is important to enlighten your client, as a professional coach about this topic, and help them discover what their dominant love language is to have a better relationship with their partner, friends, and family. 

4.   Acts of Service 

For those people, it is “Actions speak louder than words.” Any action that you may take to relieve stress from them is much appreciated. They like actions as simple as taking the trash out, making them a hot drink when they need it, doing groceries, or any of the house chores no matter how simple. They appreciate every action regardless of how big or small. 

5.   Receiving Gifts 

We often believe that those who receive gifts as their first love language are very materialistic. On the contrary, the value of what you do to get the gift such as the thought, the effort, the card chosen to pair their personality, etc. They value every gesture of receiving a gift no matter how small, to them it is not the gift, it is the thought that counts more than the value of the gift as they couldn’t care less how expensive or cheap the gift is. 

Expressing love in a different language other than the one your loved one speaks is just like one person speaking Italian and the other speaking Arabic. You may love to receive love in “Acts of Service” but your loved ones may want to receive it in “Physical Touch.” Hence, you must cross to the midpoint to compromise and learn their love language and love them the way they want and need to be loved.